1) one tequila two tequila, three tequila, floor

2) atheism is a non-prophet organization

3) if man evolved from monkeys and apes, why do we still have monkeys and apes?

4)the main reason why Santa is so jolly is because he knows where the naughty girls live

5)i went to a bookstore and asked a saleswoman,
"where's the self help section?"
she said if she told me, it would defeat the purpose

6)what if there were no hypothetical questions?

7)if a deaf person signs swear words, does his mother wash his hands with soap?

8)if someone with multiple personalities threatens to kill himself, is it considered as a hostage situation?

9)is there another word for synonym?

10)where do forest rangers go to "get away from it all?"

11)what do you do when an endangered animal eats an endangered plant?

12)if a parsley farmer is sued, can they garnish his wages?

13)would a fly without wings be called a walk?

14)why do they lock gas station bathrooms? are they afraid someone will clean it?

15)if a turtle doesn't have a shell, is he homeless or naked?

16)can vegetarians eat animal crackers?

17)if the police arrest a mime, do they still tell him he has the right to remain silent?

18)what was the best thing before sliced bread?

19)one nice thing about egotists: they don't talk about other people

20)how is it possible to have civil war?

21)if one synchronized swimmer drowns, do the rest drown too?

22)if you ate both pasta and antipasto, would you still be hungry?

23)if you try to fail, and succeed, which have you done?

24)whose cruel idea was is for the word "lisp" to have "s" in it?

25)why are hemorrhoids called "hemorrhoids" instead of "assteroids?"

26)why is it called tourist season of we can't shoot at them?

27)why is there an expiration date on sour cream?